Once more although you may not ever see this or ever take the time to read this I just wanted to say the things im not able to say to you. You are turning 45 years old today I cant believe your getting old LOL.. Yes 45 is old since I can remember your 28th birthday and grandmas and I can remember your 30th birthday at the lake and you almost had a midlife crisis that soon haha.. God I miss you there is not a day that goes by that I don't ponder the fact that it will be 3 years before we ever get to have a normal father daughter relationship again or be a normal family. Please don't let that place change you I love you the way you are I don't look at you any different your still my father my friend and my teacher I miss you so much!!!!!!!!! Some times life isn't so fair but we all have to pay the prices for the choices we make whether they are good or bad. I don't look at you any different your still my daddy and you raised me to be the woman I am today and I think you did a pretty good job. I remember rushing to the truck just to get to go to food world with you. Those are times we both took for granted. When granny died I learned that you never know when the next day may be the last you never know when tomorrow will never come or one day you will be forced to be away from the ones you love the most. I just want you to know that you are my father and there is nothing going to change that, nothing in this world and I pray please don't let that place change who you are.. Just your habits haha. We are a strong family and I say that because we have been to hell and back and we will still fight for each other, stand be side each other no matter who or what tries to come between us. All I can say is thank you for the courage you have gave me the strength to keep goin when I fall on my face and all the times when you were there for me when I felt like no one was there. I still think about when granny died and I felt like no one was there and each time I turned there you were to hold me up, to let me cry, and to keep me company when I felt like my world was crashing around me, to hold my world up as I watched it fall. To back me up and help me move to Indiana when you completely disagreed with me and even though it was hard for you to let it go you still did it and at times to stand behind me even if you knew I was wrong. The time we had as a family was short and cherished but we will pick it up as soon as you and mom are both home!. I miss you guys more then you will ever know or ever imagine. Happy 45th Birthday I hope to see you soon I love you and miss you extremely.
Love you always
your little girl
Carrie
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